Beschrijving
For years, I pushed myself to be social and was always exhausted by it. I felt constantly guilty for not being social enough, and for not being able to do it like everyone else, no matter how hard I tried to maintain a standard social circle.
My autism diagnosis was such a massive relief. It finally gave me the context to understand why I found socializing so exhausting and why I'm simply not socially driven in the same way as neurotypical people.
This realization gave me the exact permission I needed to stop forcing myself. Once I took the pressure off, I could gradually start learning new, unique ways to socialize that actually work for me, like parallel play and sharing space without the pressure of forced conversation.
If you’ve ever felt like a failure for not having the "right" kind of social life, or if you’re a late-diagnosed Autistic/ADHD adult wondering why connection feels so hard, I hope my story helps you feel less alone. There is no single right way to be social. There is only the way that works for you.
📘 Chapters
00:00 Realising my anxiety was Autism
02:25 Going to groups differently
04:55 Letting myself be unmasked
07:04 Finding a group that actually works for me
09:48 Understanding parallel play
13:10 From avoiding people to enjoying connection
14:46 Bringing this into everyday life
15:39 Looking back and seeing patterns
18:42 Why structured spaces help
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📖 READ MY STORY
My Memoir, Top to Bottom: https://finlaygames.com/my-books/
🌿 STAY CONNECTED
Support my work on Ko-fi: https://ko-fi.com/finlaygames
Join my Gentle Newsletter: https://finlaygames.substack.com/
✨ RESOURCES & HELP
Visit my website for my blog, shop, and pay-what-you-can email support:
👉 https://finlaygames.com/links
🌈 ABOUT FINN
I’m a trans man and author documenting the "unseen work" of becoming yourself later in life. I share my lived experience with late-diagnosed Autism and ADHD, while navigating life with ME/CFS and PoTS. You’re very welcome here.
🎶 MUSIC
Outro: 10,000 Reasons (For Finn) by Sonni Regan.